Embracing Life Beyond Parenthood: Navigating the Empty Nest Transition
Fall for parents has always meant back to school – but what about when school isn’t local anymore? Or you have a child who has finally spread their wings and moved out of your home? No matter what your relationship is with your kids, living without them is a big life adjustment. Although everyone experiences it differently, here are a few universal ways to help you navigate that change.
Declutter: Decluttering a large home can be emotional, empowering, or exhausting – or all three! Take your time going through each room. Set up piles for donate, sell, and garbage so you can see all your progress. Enjoy the extra space you’re creating in your existing home and all the things you can do with it… like using it for a new hobby.
Find a New Hobby: Now that you have extra space in your home, and extra time on your hands, and maybe even extra money in your wallet, it’s the perfect time to start a new hobby (or pick back up an old one!). There are birds to watch, macrame is making a comeback, pickleball is everywhere, the gym is waiting with open arms, travel is easier than ever, cooking can be incredibly satisfying… the list is endless! Spending time on a new hobby opens the door to new interests, learning and growing as a person, and maybe even meeting new people with similar interests. Or maybe you find out that someone you already know has the same passion.
Reconnect with Friends: Life gets busy when you have kids! Plenty of people face the same struggle and are open to reconnecting once they aren’t driving to soccer, hockey, dance, swimming, horseback riding and debate club every evening and weekend. Consider reaching out via text or social media for a low-stress, low-pressure reunion with old friends. You may have even more in common now than you ever did and be able to create new shared experiences together.
Dreamsize: Consider what you could do with some of the equity in your home if you were to move to something smaller or to a different area. Or maybe you want to be in a different neighbourhood, have more amenities, live in a 55+ or other specialized community. Dreamsizing is about the opportunity to make a housing or mortgage change in this new stage of life.
If you aren’t keen on any of these strategies, consider what will help you continuously improve relationships with your kids, spouse, and yourself. Set up new routines like phone calls or weekly video chats. Schedule date nights. Try journaling. Plan the next times you can look forward to seeing your kids so that you can stay positive throughout their transition to adulthood and independence.
When to seek professional help: Depression, extreme sadness or loneliness, anxiety, and other factors should be strong indicators to seek help. Consider therapy or seeing your family doctor for their medical advice if you’re having prolonged bouts of these feelings. Take your mental health seriously, as you have plenty to look forward to.
And no matter what other tactics you choose, put patience first! For yourself, for your kids, for your spouse, for your friends, and anyone else. It’s a big life change, and not everyone will understand what you’re going through. Accept the changes as they come and look forward to the next stages of life for your capable offspring!